Back on the Grid

The last week or so has been rough. Work stress for both of us and a bit of a Hippo decom made the end of last week up until this week rocky and frustrating.

For me, I felt like I was drowning under my new work responsibilities, my old work responsibilities and my personal responsibilities (hotel blocks! registries! ring designs! oh my!)... and the more overwhelmed I felt the more I could feel old patterns of "gotta do everything perfectly, can't complain, just suck it up..." rearing their ugly heads.

And okay, it didn't help that I was PMS-ing bigtime and having not really had bad PMS before going on the pill for a year, and not having it all while I was on the pill, I wasn't entirely sure what was happening, hormonally-speaking. (Also my monthly visitor arrived abotu 4 days early... which is better than late, don't get me wrong!)

Add all of that to taxes (oh oh oh we owe!) and a major energy shift at work, as we tried, unsuccessfully to buy out the stockholders and wham bam! All of that led to one very stressed out me... I should have clued in and realized it was time to slow down for a bit when I gashed up my little finger doing dishes. (Probably should have gotten stitches... or at least had a doc look at it, but it seems to be fine now. Bled for fuckin-ever though.)

By the time Friday night, the last weekend of Teacher Training, rolled around I was already exhausted and so not in the mood for catching Gurmukh's stressed out flak about how we were doing our practicums. (My standard answer of "It's what we did last year and it was fine then" didn't seem to appease her.)

I will say this though - working out has made me stronger emotionally. Rather than backpedaling when being questioned, I stood my ground. So much so, actually, that Tej had to say "We're not criticizing you, Hari Parkash." (Really? Cause it kind of feels like it.)

Long story short, I was ready for the weekend by 9:30 on Monday!

But I wasn't alone! Marlene had similar issues. So did Ben. So when I ran into Eaglewoman on Monday afternoon I asked her what was up... and she agreed that the energy of the full moon (oh yeah? Did I mention the full moon?) had things wacky. She also said that she'd noticed on Friday night my energy was off, and she was already sending me healing energy and that she wanted to gift me with a free session. SCORE!

Now all of that is a longgggg way of getting to the heart of this episode, which was today's incredible session with Eaglewoman.

I will start by saying that I was already feeling much more productive, more appreciated and stronger in the last couple of days. Without getting all "woman-power" about it, I do think the release of getting my period (have I mentioned it was 4 dang days early?) helped immensely. But I was not prepared at all really for the incredible power of this session with Eaglewoman.

We started as we always do with an opening of the space in which she says a prayer, as I (or anyone getting a treatment) stand, slightly pigeon-toed and knees soft, hands open, spine tall. As she began her prayer I felt an immense sense of calm come over me. Then I felt tingles all up and down my spine as I saw the spirit of a young man walk around me, brushing my aura with an eagle feather. I asked to see his face and when he stood in front of me, all I saw was the deep, kind eye of a hawk, yellow and blinking calmly. Ooookaay... stage was set for some powerful mojo.

After the prayer I laid down on the massage table, and Eaglewoman covered me up with a blanket and covered my eyes with a soft cotton cloth. Her treatments are very interactive, there's no drifting off as the angels just do their magic. You've got to do some work as well... She gently places her hands on different parts of my body - mostly my heart center and tummy and begins to ask different questions: "I am feeling that you are overly stressed - how does this resonate with you? It feels like you are attached to your thinking side of your brain, your analytical side, more than usual. Breathe deeply and go back to the point where this pattern was triggered. What happened there?"

It sounds silly, but it's hard work to dig that deep and trust so much. And a lot of issue came up. Like trust - as in my ability to really trust myself on a deep level to have what it takes to live up to this new promotion. Or on an ever deeper level to be a mother. Because, as she told me for the second time, there is a little soul petitioning very very hard to come over. She says it's a boy.

But don't go getting all excited - other people have said we'll have girls, and both Ajax and I have envisioned girls in our own meditations and trances. Actually it's kind of interesting that she's said a boy, because it's showing me my own investment in having a daughter. What I really want is a healthy happy child. A girl or a boy. I know we can raise an son to be a incredible man. One of the first things I thought when Ajax and I first got together was that with him, I'd be excited to raise a son because I know he'd be such a good powerful kind compassionate man. So who knows...

Back to the treatment...
(this is getting long...)

As we moved deeper into the session (which at once seemed to fly by in 10 minutes and also seemed to be two hours), Eaglewoman helped me to uncover some deep seeded fears of moving foward into my own strength. And helped me move into a stronger feeling of self-worth and appreciation for my own gifts. She also said that because I am so sensitive I take on the emotions (worry, fear, frustration...) of those closest to me (who me?), but what I have to learn is that because I am empathic, I need to learn how to discern what is mine and what is not. And to also learn not to take the stuff that's not mine so personally.

She also said that when I'm stressed, I tend to think from my analytic mind, relying on facts, figures and what I know. But in the end relying on that stuff doesn't actually help, but hurts because when I go to that left brained world, I turn off the intuitiveness and the creativity of the other side. So it's time to "forget what I know and remember what I've forgotten."

And with that release we went deeper. The whole time she was saying that she was re-aligning my grid and my position on the grid. As she worked on solidifying the grid, she said that the elders were placing a big emerald on my heart center and were handing me the archives - both of which are thing she'd not seen with other people before. Basically it means that it's really really time for me to step fully into my spiritual power and to start expecting miracles. Not to look for them, but just expect them to arrive.

It was a powerful experience. During the hour I went wayyy out to old lives, felt I was looking over an ocean from inside a cave on a cliff and felt as if I understood the entire universe and could heal the world.

After the session we were talking about the experience - we both agreed the ocean vision felt Atlantean (Atlantic?). I'm sure I had a lifetime in Atlantis (oh here I go, all woo-woo!) as a healer, but Eaglewoman confirmed it and said not only was I a healer but I could also move things telepathically.

We also talked a little about my dreams, which are getting more and more vivid... And her take on my dreams is that, just like in waking life, I am able to shift energy and create healing energy for the people I am dreamign about. Usually it's me in the dream, but she said that I have to start learning how to discern when it really is me, and when it's someone else that I am helping to heal. So I have to become more lucid in dreamstate. This will be interesting...

After the session I felt both 12 feet tall and light as a feather. Now I am tired. But so so so very grateful. Grateful that I spend my days in a place that encourages the kind of energy work I did today, grateful that I got to spend two hours of my workday babysitting my friend Elizabeth's little girl, and most grateful of all to come home to a beautiful house on top of a hill to find two sweet happy kittens and one amazing husband.

Back on the grid. And life is good.

And we're back.

Back to Los Angeles. Back to work. Back to Mount Valentine...

We came back to LA and to amazing weather. 85 degrees. Sunny, light breeze. Just perfect. To say we were already ready for the weekend by about 10 am on Thursday would be a serious understatement. Imagine - a whole weekend with NOTHING TO DO! No plans, other than laundry. Oh and the wedding registry. Oh... and designing the invites. Oh... and dishes. Oh... and grocery shopping. Oh... and getting kitty food and flea treatment (for kitties and maybe for me too... grrr). Oh... and most important - weed out the garden!

But beyond that - nothing to do! And to be honest not much got done yesterday. Just the laundry. Well it got washed and dried. Putting it away will be today's task. Along withe above mentioned list of stuff...

So what did get done yesterday? A lovely long roundabout walk to Silver Lake Blvd for breakfast at the uber-swanky LAMILL Coffee shop. It's really not fair to call this place with it's mirrored walls and green snake-skin-like chairs and it's super fancy coffee a coffee shop. It's a coffee experience. The food was amazing too. I had baked eggs with a little bit of bacon and mushrooms - perfect size, absolutely tasty! And a virgin mojito, for which I am a sucker. This one had a mild iced tea, mint, club soda and sugar. Lots of the latter - it could have been less and still been yummy. Ben's coffee was strong, flavorful and not bitter.

A faster walk back along Sunset meant I could leave another message (this time in person!) for the manager at the Comfort Inn... this makes 5 in 5 weeks. Annoying, especially considering I am looking to give them a fair amount of business...

Back at Mount Valentine laundry was begun. Kittens were played with and cuddled. They are so happy we're home. Buster can't seem to disengage himself from my neck if I'm in bed. Boy is he going to be confused when I have a kid who's pretty much in that same region on a regular basis! Ella just rolls around in ecstasy every time we go near her and lets us rub her little heart-center, purring the whole time.

Around 2:00 I checked the Gluten-Free Girl's website and found an intriguing post on arepas. Little cornmeal pancakes. It called for pre-cooked white cornmeal, found mostly at Latino markets. Well, hello! We are surrounded by Latino markets! What a great excuse for another walk... So Ben and I went down to the better of the three within a 5 minute walk, stopping at the antique shops along the way.

Also stopped at Simple, which is a very cute little party store.. emphasis on little. But they sell lemon drops and gumballs in paint cans! PAINT CANS! And have not one, not two, but FOUR cupcake recipe books. We now need to throw a party. Who's birthday is next? (Ahem, Brian...)

At the market, I found a dizzying array of flours - rice, corn, wheat... not your average Von's this place... we ended up also coming with with the tostaditas, lime, avocado and real Mexican cokes. Mexican sodas don't have any corn or high fructose syrup. Just plain old regular sugar. You can taste the difference. And they come in much smaller bottles, just 12 oz as opposed to those crazy 48 oz things you get at 7-11.

As we walked home, I could already taste lunch: left-over roast chicken, tossed with fresh lime juice and sprinkled with salt, laying on fresh avocado all on a crispy tostada. With lime juice drizzled cucumbers on the side. And that ice cold coke. mmmmmmm.... It was just as delicious as I thought it was going to be! I could eat that every day for a week! (In fact I will probably have it for lunch today!) We ate our lunch on the veranda (we're now calling the porch the veranda... much more fitting for Mount Valentine) and stayed out there reading until we were too hot and had to come in. I think we lasted about 2 hours.

Then a luscious nap before getting up and attempting the arepas. Mixing them was easy - pour lukewarm water into the cornmeal and mush up with your hand. It felt neat - like gritty clay. The directions on the bag said to let it sit for five minutes so I did. Next time I make them I will try Shauna's recipe, which has a different ratio of cornmeal to water and also has oil. And no waiting - you just pop them right on the skillet. And then you wait. They have to cook for a long time on both sides and then in the oven too.

When they were done (or rather, when I couldn't wait any more because it was 9 pm and I was hungry) I cut one up and the inside was mushy and it tasted like cream of wheat, but with a corny flavor. I thought it was weird. I put some butter on it. Better. Duh.

Ben actually really like them, and ended up using two for buns for his buffalo burger and was really happy about it. So that's good. I will attempt them again later today... I think mine need to be thicker and a little bigger.

So yeah - after the registry, the invites, after the dishes, after the GARDEN, I will make more arepas. Mostly because I just really really like saying arepas!

Goodbye Brooklyn!

This has been an incredible experience, filled with good friends, fantastic food and lots of great wine!   

I'll write more soon when I've gotten my notes together and can write about everything (and post pictures to go along with it), but I can tell you why we are standing next to a giant pig...

Last month sometime I was reading some food blog about a rice and cheese ball (ahem, fried rice and cheese ball).  The photo made it look so good and the post from whatever blog I'd found my way to had been all about these hipster kids who lived in Manhattan and walked across the bridge and found this place called Espositos... and that's where they got the rice balls.  Turns out Espositos is only about 5 blocks from Gravity's house, so on Monday I ran in and got a rice and cheese ball.  Sadly, I forgot that the blog had advised that you ask them to heat it up, so mine was cold and not nearly as tasty as the picture led me to believe.  BUT the place was really cool - smallish, a LOT of meat and just really New York.  Plus I just really thought it was cool that I could read about someplace and get there.  

We ended up also get some soprasata (spelling???) there which was so yummy that we're bringing a roll of it home for Jimmy and Abby.  

In our last few hours here (car comes at 2:30 to take us away from the magic-land known to us as Carroll Gardens), we'll take the last of Ben's stuff to the pack & ship, get a little gifty for Blue (who's probably reading this, so I'm not saying what she's getting!), and tool around Smith Street.  

I've loved every single minute of being here. It's been a magical experience - every day different, every day fun and relaxing and perfect.  And so much like the playa that I know deep-down, if we actually ever moved here, it would never be like it was this week.  This week has been a week of ideals - every night spent dining out (or in) with good friends, every day spent walking somewhat aimlessly from place to place.  Not a real life.  But a really wonderful vacation from real life. 

New York = Playa in real time

So this weekend has been an amazing combination of fantastic food and incredible friends... but what has struck me the most this trip is how much like Burning Man this experience is. I'm not naive enough (or hopeful enough!) to think that New York is just like this all the time.  It's the entire package - staying with Gravity, seeing Brian and Surly and all our amazing hippos and the almost total lack of structure we enjoyed over the weekend. 

I was thinking yesterday more about Brian's party.  It was mostly Hippos: us, Gravity, Brian and Surly, Playatollah and Ruckus, David and Victor, Marguiles... enough to feel like we were in the dome or the SAO and what I finally realized yesterday was that once again, when I'm with Hippos I'm home.  It's a lot like when I see Mom or am just at home with Ajax - I'm the most comfortable, the most at peace I ever am.  So many times at parties, even at parties where I know people really well, I feel awkward and weird and not sure of myself or what to talk about.  But just like being at Burning Man, Saturday night was a night of feeling confident, cute, sexy, smart and well, to be honest, appreciated and loved.  It's a powerful feeling.  And I think everyone felt that way - we were all sort of high in a different way from the powerful combination of our energies.  

Yesterday was really similar.  We went out for dimsum with Brian, Surly and Brian's brother Andy and adorable, non-annoyingly precocious nephew Chase (the kid can put away some dimsum!).  It was a slow morning, everyone on their own time, knowing that eventually our collective times would match up and we'd be where we were supposed to be.  After dimsum, Ajax and I tooled around Brooklyn with Gravity.  I gotta say I am loving Brooklyn.  The families, the young couples - total hipster vibe, but really just awesome.  Then Ajax and I hopped the train to Manhattan, with the idea of going by Golden Bridge so I'd know where I was going this morning.  But as luck would have it, we ended up on an express train and the first stop that made sense to get off at was Union Square.  So we called Ruckus and dropped in on him for a few hours... It was really cool to see Ajax's old place and old neighborhood - I could see why he loved living there.  After a while Playatollah came by and off we went to Katz for sandwiches, which we took to-go and then hopped a cab back to Brooklyn for one last drink with Brian and Surly who left this morning.  

Having a little taste of the playa and especially being able to hang out with Ajax, Brian, Gravity, Playatollah and Ruckus so much has been incredible.  I spent most of my time with them my first year on the playa - an experience that completed altered my life in more ways than one.  And I'd seen so many photos and heard so many stories about the NY Hippos and their parties that it was just amazing and sweet and uplifting to be here and be a part of this little family.  

Today is my day on my own - yikes!  Will be extra weird after 2 days of being with people non-stop.  I'm going to Golden Bridge for class and then to who knows where!  Just tool around the Village and SoHo I guess!  

New York New York

It's a hell of a town!

We arrived at JFK at 5 am, got to Gravity's place in Brooklyn by 5:45 am, I was crashed out on the couch by 6:15 am (while the boys went on a walkabout for few hours!) and by 1 pm we were sitting in the bleachers at center field at Yankee Stadium soaking up the surprising sun and eating hot dogs and peanuts!

Last night was a fantastic party for Brian's 40th - a party filled with hippos we adore like Playatollah, Ruckus, David and Victor, Marguiles...  it was a wonderful night full of laughter, sillyness and hats.  Pictures later...  

I am so happy to be here - I adore Brooklyn.  Gravity lives above this fantastic little cafe (The Petit Cafe on Court) and it was so cool to go downstairs, get coffee and come back up.  In 5 minutes.  The energy of the city is amazing - it just feels so  great to be here.  

 I had more insightful things to say, but a) can't remember them and b) we have to go eat dim sum now.