Workin' it out...

Yep, that's me... Just two weeks of workouts... Ain't I buff?

Marlene, SP and I have become little gym rats - well, maybe not so little, but we aspire to it. Spinning, strength-cardio training, core training... you name it, if the class is between 9 - 5, we are there.

To be honest, it's been a couple of weeks and the numbers on the (horrible evil) scale in the Wellness Center have done nothing to encourage me to continue, but yet, I am totally loving the whole experience.

Spinning is ridiculous - a bunch of people all lined up on stationary bikes and an almost unbearably perky instructor yelling at us to "Go go go! UP that hill!"

Um. What hill? There's no hill. There's no road. There's only the annoyingly skinny dancers in front of me who could not possibly be at their personal 10 in resistance and still be chatting like they are getting their nails done. Sometimes Jessica, the spinning instructor, tells us that she needs to work out extra hard because she went to The Griddle and she ate half a pancake. Now granted The Griddle's portions are stupid-big - seriously, we often DON'T go there because we just don't want that much food. But still... half a pancake? And for that we are all tortured?

Oh but I digress (what? me? digress?). The class is hard. Really hard. I am constantly watching the clock, thinking "how can only 5 minutes have passed???" But then on the last bit, I hit that magical rush. That amazing full body tingle that is almost orgasmic (but without all the moaning). I hit that and think "I can do this FOREVER! This is amazing! I love this!" And then I remember that feeling and that's what brings me back again.

Today, as I was in the strength-cardio class, doing tap-backs and corner-crosses on my step and generally getting my ass kicked by Rachelle the strength instructor (oh. Did I mention Rachelle is 7.5 months PREGNANT??) I started thinking about body image and perception. In spin class yesterday I got stuck in front of a mirror. Same in strength class last week. It was seriously distracting to keep looking up, think "Who's that girl?" and then realize it was me. My body, thanks to the medical miracle that's known as hormonal birth control, transformed over the last year and I gained more weight than I'd like to admit.

Now I'm off the evil hormones, getting my body back to it's "natural" state before I fill it up with a baby. And here's what I've noticed in the past 20 days: I have way more energy. I am excited to work out. I am craving vegetables and completely disinterested in meat. My sugar cravings are lower - not gone, but not super strong. I feel clearer and happier. I've got a stronger libido (sorry if that's TMI). Mostly I just feel a lot happier and more comfortable with my body.

So looking at myself in the mirror and NOT liking what I see was sort of a blow for me because I was feeling so good. But rather than give into the thoughts, I decided to see what it would be like to transform them. So each time I looked up in spin class yesterday and thought I saw huge hips, I would look down again and look back up with the intention of seeing hips that were slimming as I looked at them. I started to visualize fat dripping off me and pooling around the bike (gross I know, but it worked). I began to feel my muscles actually toning and getting stronger.

And this morning when that nasty little voice of doom started up again, I just kept thinking how happy I am to be able to move my body in this way and even if I never fit into a size 10 again, as long as I feel good about the way I take care of my body, then I will be fine.

Also SP says that they tweak the mirrors in the workout rooms to make you look fatter so you'll come back.

I like that theory too.